Black Phoebe

I'm back in my apartment in Los Angeles.  The place feels empty.  It's a cavernous two-story with a spiral staircase.  It's way too big for just me, but I do appreciate living alone.

I like to be left to my thoughts.  I really do.

When the weather is nice {which is almost always} I like to open the windows and let the breeze blow through my place.  Even though I live next to the 101 freeway I can hear a lot of bird songs.

The owners of this building went to great lengths to add gardens and trees wherever they could.  This attracts birds & stray cats and all sorts of interesting bugs.  As long as they respect my space I respect theirs.

Black phoebes twitter around my windows and hop around on my balcony -- they're really cute!  I have an African-American girl who works with me named Phoebe.  She even puts, "Black Phoebe" on her headshot; signs her name that way too!

Phoebe is a PA at Jukebox Studios, but she wants to get into acting.  She's super beautiful.  I think she's probably going to make it.

It's going to be funny seeing everyone at Jukebox after being away for so long.  I'm going back on Monday. In the meanwhile I'm going to enjoy some quiet time.

I'm just going to sit here for awhile and let the days wash over me.

Where you at?

Hi!  Remember me?

I've literally been without my tablet for days.  I did something horrible to it and now it doesn't work.  I've been reduced to posting from my phone, which isn't the greatest to begin with.

Good news is: I'm returning to LA tomorrow!  Yay!

I've had an existential visit with my family, and now we're closer than ever.  Bad news is: I'm back on "island time" and it's going to take a serious adjustment to get back to being a busy bee at two jobs.

Thanks to all of you who have been reading and checking in.  And a very special thanks to you-know-who for being so understanding! XOXO

I'll start posting new comics soon.

Tera

Taco milk

I went shopping at Chode's today.

Just to be clear, Chode's is the neighborhood grocery store, a chode is a euphemism for naughty bits.

Anyway I was in Chode's shopping and I forgot my glasses.  I'm very self-conscious about wearing glasses and I almost subconsciously leave them behind whenever I go somewhere that I really need them.  Particularly when I'm not wearing contacts, which I wasn't.

I was perusing {more like squinting really hard} the new products aisle and  saw a package for "Taco Milk."  Sounds disgusting, but I'm an adventurous girl and I picked up a container.  Just as I was doing so an elderly man tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Miss, you are very beautiful.  I'm 86, I tell the truth."

I thanked him and before he walked away he said, "By the way, that taco mix is delicious."

I was simultaneously pleased and alarmed by his comments.  Beautiful? Me? Flattery will get you everywhere. Taco mix? I thought it was Taco milk. And who even thinks there's such a thing as taco milk? What the aitch?

Worst of all, are my eyes really as bad as an 86 year olds?

A letter to boys

I wonder about you boys and your fetishes. I'm not talking about latex & ball gags, I mean the more pedestrian kind. I've seen all kinds of boys with all kinds of obsessions: boobies, booty, va-jay-jay, feet and even cuticles.  


I've even had to say, "Hey buster, I'm up here.  If you wanna nurse on somebody go back home to your mama!" 


I didn't really say that, but I wanted to!


When I see a boy I'm attracted to, I'm attracted to him as a whole.  I think it would be kind of weird if I were all obsessed over one specific part, like the man-bag for instance.


That's not to say I've got a thing for balls -- trust me, I don't -- so please don't send pictures, I'm just trying to make a point.


Girls are all about the person and boys are all about the parts.  I know I'm generalizing, but it's generally true.


Whenever I wear a low-cut top boys stare at my cleavage as if it was broadcasting the latest sports scores.  


And don't say, "If you don't want us to look then don't dress that way."  Sorry to burst your bubble but girls don't dress for boys, they dress for other girls. There's a clothing competition in the secret world of chicks that you've probably never even heard of.


In closing, if you do find a girl who loves your man-bag don't let her get away because loving a scrotum takes commitment: those things are seriously ugly.

Cotton pony

In case you haven't noticed I'm a bit of a handful.

I know I'm talented, somewhat pretty, witty and smarter than the average bear, but I am an emotional tsunami:  When I blow into town, there's very little left standing.

This is especially true during my Moon Cycle.  I've written several comics on this subject so I'll spare you the gory details, but when I'm riding the cotton pony my moods can swing wildly and I can get emotional over just about anything.

Have you ever seen the highway safety sign with the silhouettes of the family running across the freeway? That made me cry once.

What I'm trying to say is: I make rash, emotion-driven decisions when I'm like this and sometimes other people get hurt.  This time it was a boy I was seeing, let's call him "Timmy."

Timmy and I were, like made for each other.  He is funnier and more talented than me -- and I find that very appealing!

Anyway, my traveling, jet lag, family drama and blood letting finally got the best of me and I took it out on poor Timmy {my heart is still broken over this so please don't laugh.}  I'm pretty sure my excuse for getting mad was less than legitimate, but -- good reason or no -- I was GENUINELY mad and I have no control over it.  Kind of like the Hulk or something.

The conclusion I came to was: I can't have a man in my life.  If I do, one day I'm going to be all over the news as the lady who snipped off her boyfriend's wiener with the garden shears.

So Timmy, please understand: I didn't mean to hurt you, I just wanted you to keep your junk intact.

Lifestyle intervention

It's so warm in Mangilao, even warmer than Los Angeles.  I guess I forgot how tropical it is here almost year round.

I'm glad I came. I feel loved and cared for when I'm around my family.  That's something I haven't felt anywhere else.

I had my "lifestyle intervention", and believe it or not,  it was a was a cathartic experience: I feel cleansed.  I was initially resistant to the idea but now I know it was necessary.  I had definitely gone off the rails.

During my intervention my Dad offered to fix all the messes I've made by paying my unpaid bills and settling other uh... unsettling business -- all in exchange for me staying in Mangilao permanently.

For the first time in my life I told him no.  I told him that I could see that I had shamed him and I would never do that again.  I told him I knew that I was making horrible decision but those days were over. I told him that I needed to clean up my own messes or I'd never learn how to live a respectable life on my own.

And you know what?  He said he understood.

What the aitch?

Lesson of a lifetime: never underestimate your parents.

Men are all the same

It's quarter to three AM here in Mangilao and I'm angry, angry about something I probably don't have a right to be angry about.  I started off peeved but now my face is flushed and my skin is hot to the touch and that's a sure sign that I'm GENUINELY angry. Grrr!

And now I can't sleep and that's making me even more angry.

I'm sure you can guess what I'm angry about from the title of this post. Did I mention I'm really angry?

On a positive note: I've been getting a lot of super sweet comments and emails from my readers and I cannot tell you how good that makes me feel. I require a lot of attention in case you haven't noticed.

Here's a couple examples of palate-cleansing fan art I just got.  I'm going to write a nice email to the boys who created them right now.

Day at the beach

I spent the day at the beach.  I worked there, actually: drawing for my job at the studio.  I have an Asus slate and I can draw right on the screen.  It's a fabulous little device, and it allows me to do my work remotely while I'm here in Guam ... and while it's a little on the pricey side, I couldn't recommend it more.

My day at the beach got me thinking about how much time I used to spend in the water, and how much that used to frustrate my family.

I wrote a comic on this very subject a few years ago.  Here it is:

                                                                Click to enlarge

A positive spin

A reader pointed out that I've been whining a lot so today I'm going to blog about positives.

Did you know that I'm a good surfer?  Well I am.  I have excellent balance for such an imbalanced girl, someone once pointed out.

My Mom use to say I loved the water so much I was probably half fish.

I don't go in the water much anymore.  That's probably because my girlfriend got eaten by a shark. Well, not eaten. "Bit" is probably more accurate, but it just doesn't sound as dramatic.

We were out beyond the breakers. I never even saw the shark. Suddenly there was my best friend, sticking her bisected hand in my face, screaming for her life.

I remember praying to Jesus to please let us make it back to shore alive.

My friend lost a few fingers but she's fine. I call it her "Creepy hand," she calls it her "Lucky hand."

Hmmm... I think I just learned a lesson from my own blog!

Tera

PS: I wrote a comic about this incident a few years ago.  Here it is:

Click to enlarge

Uneasy lies the head

My sleeping pattern is out of whack.  I suffer from serious jet lag, and I've barely slept since I left Los Angeles. Ugh.

Adding to my frustrations is the intermittent Internet here, which is my only connection to the civilized world.

I'm staying at my parent's place in Mangilao.  I was so happy to see my Mom and brother I broke down and cried.  A lot.  Too much.  Like hysterical, inconsolable sobbing.  They think something's up.  And so do I.  I've been holding in a lot of shame and now it's spilling out all over my parents white wall-to-wall carpeting.

The Colonel {my Dad} will be coming home from the base soon.  Oh boy.  I'm well into my twenties but I feel like I'm twelve when I'm in his house.

My Dad printed out some choice examples of my comic strip and left them on my bed for me to see.  I suppose I could say they're all fiction, but I don't lie.  Ever.  And I'm certainly not going to start now.

Packing for Mangilao

I'm packing for my big trip home.  Home, in my case, is Mangilao.

I always over pack to the point that I need a Sherpa to haul all my stuff for me.  After every trip I discover I haven't even used half the stuff I brought.

My parents have requested I return home on "family business."  I've heard thru the grapevine {via my brother, Robert} that I'm to be the subject of an intervention.

It's not a drug thing, or even alcohol, even tho I drink more than I should.  It's more in the nature of a lifestyle intervention.  My father, who is an old school disciplinarian, caught wind of my comic strip {also courtesy of Robert} and took a look online.

Whoops.

I guess that'll teach me for telling the world about my questionable decisions.

My Dad is not going to want me to return to California.  He won't care that I have two jobs, friends and other things I care about deeply.  I'll be annoyed but I know deep down all he wants is what's best for me.

I'm sure some unpleasant surprises await me tho.  I know I've been bad and I'm ready to take my medicine, so to speak.

But me returning to live in Mangilao?  That ain't gonna happen.

Stay tuned for the fireworks.

Stanley

This one is a little sensitive so you might want to look away.

Click to enlarge

Moon Cycle

Here's another early strip of mine.  I think my drawings were starting to get a little better at about this point.

Click to enlarge

The G Word

I still say a little prayer for him every night.

Click to enlarge

Fat as Mud

Here's another of my early strips.  There was a time in my life when I thought I could act; the Entertainment industry disagreed.

Click to expand

Sunny Sylmar

Here's my very first comic strip from way back in '07. Simpler time, simpler lines.

Click to enlarge

Breakfast of Champions

I don't drink coffee in morning, I drink hot cocoa. And even tho I typically eat a healthful diet I like to have Fig Newtons with my cocoa.

I know it's terrible but it hasn't killed me yet.

I have the cocoa & Newtons on my balcony while I look out over the 101 freeway and watch the cars zip by.  I try to catch a glimpse of the driver's faces so I can make up stories to go along with them, like: the angry guy coming home from the Commerce Casino, a girl who doesn't know that this is the day she'll meet her future husband, and the lady singing along with the radio who's about to cause a six car pileup.

Is this odd behavior? Maybe. I really enjoy it, tho.

People always ask if the freeway is dirty or noisy or disgusting but it really isn't.

In its own spartan way it's quite beautiful.

Feminine Protection

Every so often I'm going to post an issue of Tera 101.  Here's one from a few months ago:

Click to expand

Hope

Hope is a funny thing.

Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to wake up and get motivated when you've got just a little hope in your life?

I've got a few things trending my way and this morning I burst out of bed to watch the sun come up from my balcony... only problem is the sun doesn't come up for another half an hour.  LOL, it's still black as night out and cars on the 101 {which I can see from my place} all have their headlights on.

My friends and family are happy & healthy, both my jobs are working out, I can pay my rent and I've got a {possible} new boy in my life who seems like the real deal.  Who could ask for more?

What I'm trying to say is, February is shaping up to be a fine month.  I've asked for a lot, I've worked for a lot, and everything is really coming together.

All of this {of course} is subject to change, but I'm going to enjoy it while its here!

Sanjo

Here's my latest comic.  If Sanjo sees this he'll never speak to me again!

Oh my gosh!

This it's my first post, but not my first rodeo, so to speak.  I write and draw an autobiographical comic called, Tera 101.  If you find me at all interesting please go check it out at http://tera101.weebly.com/

The freeways are empty and the supermarket is crowded. It must be Super Bowl Sunday!